Pain

My 2 year old daughter Brooklyn was playing with her Mommy out on our deck. I could see and hear them both through the kitchen window. The playing ended in a thud on the deck, followed quickly by shrill crying. You know what I'm talking about? The type of crying that peels paint off the walls. The type of real crying where something is wrong and requires a parents' immediate response.

By the time I got to the window, Mommy was already holding Brooklyn in her arms and was assessing the damage. Brooklyn had lost her footing and fell on her face. Typical 2 year old clumsiness I suppose. Blood was beginning to pool in Brooklyn's lips and around her teeth. No permanent damage, but a hurtful event with blood (which we told her was paint) nonetheless.

About 4 seconds after Mommy picked up Brooklyn an interesting thing happened. Brooklyn started to chant, "Mommy kiss it! Mommy kiss it! Mommy kiss it!". But that isn't the interesting part. After Mommy gently kissed her swollen lips the crying stopped. No whimpering, fussing, or sniveling. She instantly turned back into a happy, sweet little girl.

This painful event in a 2 year olds life was fixed in an instant. Logic tells me that kissing the wound did not take the pain away. I don't know much about the physiology of pain. But I can't accept the fact that pain signals from Brooklyn's mouth instantly stopped telling her brain about the trauma. However, somehow in some unexplained way, the pain was gone and she was able to move on with her life.

Allow me to take a stab at explaining how we can make pain a temporary event in our lives:

1. Realize that pain is inevitable, but wallowing in it is a choice. We all are going to experience pain in our lives. We don't have to focus on it. Don't dwell on the question "why me?!" for too long. Time spent rolling around in your pain is not time well spent.

2. Tell yourself how things could be worse. If you stub your toe, at least you didn't break it. If you broke your toe, at least you only broke one. If you broke multiple toes, at least you didn't break your foot. If you broke bones in your foot, at least you didn't break your leg. You see? It could always be worse so focus on how you are fortunate that it isn't any worse.

3. Make the conscious choice to focus on positive things. Yes, you lost your job. But you have your family don't you? That is something to focus on. Something that can bring you joy despite your momentary pain.

4. Ask for help. God is the obvious choice here isn't he? Do you think God wants you to live in constant pain? Of course not. He wants you to experience joy! So ask him continually how to get there. You can also ask those around you. Tell them your hurt and ask them to help you out of it. We aren't meant to live life alone. We are designed to share in each others joy and help each other through the pain.

We all make a choice on how to react to things in our lives. Slips and falls will happen. That's OK. It's just important to get through it as quickly as possible and move on with our lives!